Would you just shut up?

I think the saddest statement that can be made about the world we live in is the statement that people are making in DEFENCE of attacking people on twitter. And not just any people on twitter, people who write the tv shows they claim to love. I'm not even sure what that says about people. It honest to god worries me that this world is becoming this place, where attacking isn't only done but it's later on defended.

Bullying and harassing and insulting is NOT okay. What has the internet done to society that it's now apparently accepted that if you are brave enough to put your writing out there, you should put up with personal insults? How is that okay? How does that even sound okay? It makes me wonder if this is what people like Perez Hilton have done to the world, that insulting someone famous is okay because well they put themselves out there for it. These people chased a dream that's really hard to attain, they worked hard, they put their hearts and souls into things, and what they get in return is insults and attacks on twitter and blogs. Can someone tell me what in this equation actually sounds right?

And don't pretend it's okay to do it to writers because it happens to other celebrities all the time...that doesn't make it right, that just means it's wrong in that case too. (Side note...as I've already been accused of being a hypocrite as god know I'm vocal about my dislike of a certain Grey's actress. I have NEVER actually insulted her. I have said I do not like her acting. I am not impressed by some of her off stage antics such as bad mouthing her own movies and going public with her desire for a better plot...but I have NEVER insulted her.)

There's a difference between criticism and insults. Most writers I know THRIVE on criticism. I know personally when I get a review of someone telling me what they didn't like and why, I'm excited. It can make me a better writer. A while ago someone commented on a fic of mine saying I used the term "Or something" too much in that update, and let me tell you, the next update I watched myself for that and have been doing so ever since. So thank you to the person that said that. Someone saying they don't understand why a character made a certain choice, someone saying they dont like a certain plot and explaining WHY, that is amazing to hear. It means that people are paying attention, it means they care enough to want to help you improve. I have never stumbled upon a writer that didn't welcome some kind of criticism of their work. It's the only way to improve.

But when someone just insults your work on no basis, or even worse, insults you personally, that's not called for. In no world should that be considered okay. They are not putting themselves out there to be insulted and the fact that there's people in this world that think that that's acceptable behaviour makes me sick.I'm sure Shonda and Co didn't expect everyone to love the Post it note or Dead Denny. I'm sure they expected responses saying "I don't think that made sense" or "I'm just tired of Denny" and "Why can't Mer/Der make it really official?". But when it goes past that, that becomes a problem.

And as for the people defending those attacks, as someone said on the ABC boards the other day, they're blaming the victim. These people are coming out and saying that attacks are okay because the writer is on twitter and putting themselves out there. Does that not sound absurd to anyone else? Krista Vernoff has been defending herself on twitter, asking people to stop with the insults and people are acting like she's the one in the wrong. Yes, she has a job because of the fans but how does that equal her putting up with personal insults because of something she wrote? I honestly wonder if people sit back and consider the fact that these writers are REAL people with REAL feelings. And saying they should sit back and take the insults, to me is the equivalent of telling a kid that they should just take being bullied because they have to go to school every day, or telling a woman being sexually harassed to put up with it because she wore a skirt to work. NO ONE SHOULD HAVE TO PUT UP WITH HARASSMENT.

As for the other stuff I have seen fans doing on twitter, the demanding explanations as to why something happened, the non-stop posts by some asking for something that the writer may not even be able to give, the people that are expecting Shonda (or any other tv writer) to give them what they want...that's not right either. I have seen so many people say "But why doesn't Shonda write what we want to see?" Who is this we? In no way should the writers pander to the fans. Listen to their opinions? Yes. But their main concern should be staying true to the story they want to tell and the characters they created. While we don't always like it, Grey's has done a very good job at that. To me that's what marks a good writer, not whether or not they give the fans every single thing they want. At the end of the day, a writers job is to tell a story. If you like it, that's great but if you don't, that's not on the writer. They for no reason should have to defend what they did, explain what they did, give you answers to every single question you may have. That is not their job. it is not their job to write what YOU want to see. It is their job to write the show. Simple as that.

As for all the misleading and other complaints...it's part of the game. It's part of the world. Shonda said it was Mer/Der's wedding day but she refused to say if they would get married. People all over buzzed about would they/wouldn't they. Shonda's job is done. Shonda didn't do it to be rude, she didn't do it because she doesn't respect the fans, she did it to make people talk about the show. I know I for one had numerous conversations with friends whether or not I thought they were actually going to do it. I know I heard numerous casual fans talk about it in depth (I also haven't heard one casual fan complain about the bait and switch). if she had said "Oh well they give their wedding to Alex/Izzie" the buzz would have been much lower. I understand why it's annoying. It's never fun to anticipate one thing and not get it. I'm still angry at the Bones people for "Booth and Bones sleep together at the end of the season" and then it being a dream. But it's the nature of the beast and Shonda is hardly the only show runner to do it, she's hardly the show runner who started it. It's not going to stop. Any form of advertisement since the beginning of time has had some form of misleading info in it. You don't have to take it so personally.

The only other misleading thing...the whole "I want my money back from the charities I gave to for two fictional characters on their fictional wedding day"...I'm not addressing that. Because I don't think I even want to consider what kind of person gets angry about giving to a charity. I hope one day they all wake up and realize they're crap people.

Yes, this is long and rambling...but as someone who has been personally insulted numerous times (called a whore, told I didn't deserve to live...) because of my fanfiction I know what it feels like to put something out there and be attacked because of it. My best friend/writing partner and I have left boards to get away from it because it takes all the joy out of writing. The Grey's writers can't switch to get away from it. And they shouldn't have to avoid twitter because of it. So yeah, I get long and rambling defending them and any other writer.

Simply put, if you don't like what's on the screen, take a deep breath and look at the remote. It's usually at the top, a tiny little button that says "Power". Turn the tv off.

Whatever happened to if you don't have something nice to say don't say anything at all?